The second annual Madison Hirlehey Memorial Golf Tournament goes at Paradise Canyon on July 29th with proceeds going to the Ronald McDonald House in Calgary. Maddie was originally diagnosed in the summer of 2006 with Acute T-Cell Lymphoblastic Lymphoma at the age of 4. The fight lasted 7 years. I worked a number of years with Madison’s father Steve when we were both at Global so I was aware of the many trials and tribulations and road trips that come with treatment of the disease. Steve answered some very difficult questions, took us through his 2 holes in one and without me even asking decided the world needed to know what CDs he would take on a desert island. (Over-achiever.)
Your daughter Madison battled cancer for most of her life losing her fight at the age of 11. Tell us about her.
Maddie was our hero. She fought everything so hard and rarely with complaints. She knew what she had to do and just did it. (Wow, this is tough to write.)
Sure, she had her moments, but for the most part she was a very happy little girl. She absolutely loved babies. At Ronald McDonald House she would always gravitate towards any babies. She would always hold them and play with them, to the delight of their parents. (I’m really having a tough time with this one so I’m just going to move on to the next question.)
The battle you and your family had to endure was obviously an emotional journey. But it also brings financial hardships. For anyone who might be facing a similar situation, talk about some of the unexpected costs you had to face in terms of what the government or your workplace doesn’t cover.
I believe things may have changed since we were going through it but the Province did have a program where they helped cover some of the costs of travel, meals and lodging. It wasn’t a lot but any little bit helped. We were lucky enough to have amazing friends and family that helped us out quite a bit. Some friends organized a golf tourney and a garage sale to help raise funds as well. Later on when we had to live in Calgary for almost 10 months, we decided to try crowd funding which in our case helped out too. There are so many out of pocket costs including meals, parking, gas etc. Having a sick child is very expensive.
Proceeds of this tournament go to Ronald McDonald House in Calgary. I know this is a very easy question for you. How important were they for you and your family?
Wow! That is really an easy one. Ronald McDonald House was invaluable. When your child gets seriously ill, your world is turned upside down. When Maddie got sick, we were told to get up to Calgary immediately. It was Stampede week so there were no hotels available and RMH was full. After a week of my wife sleeping in a chair at Maddie’s bedside and me in a cot in the hospital family room, a room opened up at RMH. The moment we walked in we were welcomed with open arms. We knew right there and then we had found our Calgary home and at $12 a night was a huge savings over any hotel.
Over the course of all the trips to Calgary and the stays at Ronald McDonald House you met a lot of people who were in the same situation as you were. While people you work with may be well intentioned, I suspect they don’t have the same insight as someone who is going through the exact same scenario. How important was it to meet those people?
You just hit the nail on the head Mark. The best thing about staying at RMH is the other families as well as the staff. You’re right. We very much appreciated the support and understanding from friends and family but no one understood what we were going through better than the other families going through the same thing. It was wonderful to be able to sit down and hear the other parents talk about the ups and downs of their journeys and even let us know what we might be able to expect in ours. After a while we became one of the families that new parents came to for understanding. It is very much like a big family there and we still keep in contact with many people we met and we are also very close to some of the staff members.
Where does Ronald McDonald House get its funding?
RMH is fully funded by donations only. Many people think that McDonalds Restaurants fund the charity but only a portion of McHappy Day proceeds go to Ronald McDonald House. For more information on how RMH is funded you can go to rmhsouthernalberta.org
You’ve got another daughter who was younger that Maddie but had to deal with the loss of her big sister. How did she handle it and how is she doing now?
Sam is 2 and a half years younger that Maddie. Maddie’s illness and eventual loss was very hard on her. They were very close, they fought like sisters, but still very close. Sam certainly didn’t get near the attention she deserved from myself and her mom. I believe she understood and still understands why but it had a definite impact on her. She’s doing much better now and we’re very proud of how she’s come through everything.
What’s the best advice you can give to parents who are about to deal with a similar situation you endured?
There are a few things I would suggest. 1. Take one day at a time. Don’t worry about things that may or may not happen tomorrow. 2. Ask questions. You know your child best. If something seems wrong, question the docs. 3. Accept any and all help that’s offered. You’ll need it.
To happier things. Talk about why you decided to undertake a golf tournament. I suspect it’s more than just booking a golf course and phoning a few friends.
Ha ha. Yup, I found out last year that it’s really hard work. I did most of the work myself last year and it took up most of my time. Fortunately this year I have a committee and lots of help. Still a lot of work but not so daunting on myself.
I felt I needed to do something to give back and I also wanted to keep Madison’s memory alive. I realized there are many charity golf tournaments in this city but I needed to do something that I would be totally committed to and as you know I am totally committed to golf.
This is the second year of the tournament. How successful was last year’s event?
Last year’s event was very successful for a first year event. We had a total of 60 golfers and sponsorship was very good. We managed to donate $18,000 to Ronald McDonald House Southern Alberta.
Anything new for this year?
This year’s tournament is looking great! We have some great new sponsors on board. Have to mention that Two Guys Pizza will be on the 14th hole this year. A few other new surprises await the golfers this year as well.
What kind of prizes are up for grabs?
It’s very exciting! We have hole in one prizes up for grabs on all 5 par 3’s this year. Some have more than one available so there’s plenty of opportunity to win. Just like last year we intend to have some sort of skill prize on every hole as well.
Do you intend to continue with this tournament?
You bet. I would love this tournament to eventually be one of the elite tournaments in the city. A must play tourney if you will!
You’ve have had 2 holes in one. Take us through each one and how much did you spend buying rounds in the club house.
Well if I must. The first was 4 years ago on Hole #7 on the Heritage nine at Picture Butte. It was playing about 115 yards so I hit my pitching wedge. The shot looked pretty good, we heard a loud crack as it hit the bottom of the cup on the fly. It was also special because I was wearing a pair of my dad’s shorts. He had just passed away that spring.
The second was 2 years later on Hole #7 on the Homestead nine at Butte as well, also known as the Ash Hole. I believe this is the most common hole for a hole in one at Butte because there are so many ways to do it. Mine, however, was a nice shot hitting the green and slowly rolling until it disappeared into the hole.
For both I purchased drinks for the people in my group and a few in the clubhouse. Fortunately neither were in a tournament.
Can people still sign up? If so how.
Yes, we are still looking for sponsors, prizes and golfers. People can call me directly at 403-308-4456 or go to madisongolf.ca
I was looking for the question you ask everyone but it wasn’t here. I’m going to answer it anyway.
My five CDs on a desert island:
Rainbow – Rainbow On Stage
Black Sabbath – Heaven & Hell
Judas Priest – Unleashed In The East
Pink Floyd – The Wall
David Wilcox – 60 Minutes With David Wilcox
Editor’s note: Nothing like hearing some Black Sabbath when you’re teeing off on the first hole at 7 in the morning.
Mark Boogieman 